I live in a cold climate. Not as cold as where I was born and raised, but damn cold enough. Over the past few weeks it’s been single digits in the morning and at six a.m., it’s still dark. So what do I find myself doing? Taking a plunge in hell, as far as I’m concerned, because I’m out there jogging. It’s freezing, it’s dark, and I’m miserable. It’s enough to make me ditch my hopes for health and tear open a jumbo bag of Cheetos. But not so fast! I just learned there’s a better way to stay fit, a way that not only gives stamina on the track, but stamina in the sack. I’m talking about sexercise.
We all know that there are plenty of exercises that mimic sex moves and that they’ve been around for quite awhile. Pole dancing, belly dancing, the porn star workout. But sexercise, according to trainer Jason Rosell, is designed around increasing stamina in the areas you’ll need to keep going all night long.
According to Rosell, people who aren’t in shape get tired after only four to eight minutes of intercourse. Say it isn’t so! But getting your fitness level up via sexercise will make a marathon session of the missionary mambo as easy as a walk in the park. In his workout, Rosell stresses things like deep squats (for ladies who like it on top, or so he claims), and exercises for strengthening your core so you can “pull him in deeper.” Um, yeah.
If you’re wondering just how sexy sexercising can be, check out Jason’s YouTube video, where he and fellow sexy workout buddies, who all look like they’re on the verge of mind-blowing orgasms, urge you in breathy voices to go “in and out and breathe.” Oh my.
Getting all sweaty and panting seems preferable to piling on layers and layers of clothing to run outside in the frozen tundra, but does it really work? Would a person burn more calories sexercising than, say, simply having sex? Rosell doesn’t note exactly how many calories are burned during a half hour sexercising session, but according to a recent article in the U.K.-based Daily Mail, an hour making love burns approximately the same amount of calories as a half hour jog. Hmmm. That’s interesting. But what if you’re not currently enjoying such regular late-night activity? Hey, we’re all busy and sometimes we just need our rest. On such occasions, it seems to me like you may need to supplement your sex with some sexercise.
What if, however, all of that thrusting and grinding just isn’t your thing (in public, anyway) but you’re all for sweating away unwanted pounds? Perhaps Bikram yoga could be the answer. Stretch and find your inner core inside a room that’s over 100 degrees. Practice your breathing and build your strength. That all sounded pretty good until I read that the founder of Bikram yoga is currently being investigated for allegations of sexually assaulting women who had attended his yoga training camps. Yikes. In the end, maybe I’ll just have to stick with jogging after all (sigh). That, or give in to the Cheetos.
What do you think? Are you up for some sexercising? Let me know your thoughts and remember to keep stopping by for more exercise – of the brain.
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